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The Kindness Project

The Kindness Project – Winning Isn’t Everything, Right?


Too often kindness is relegated to a random act performed only when we’re feeling good. But an even greater kindness (to ourselves and others) occurs when we reach out even when we aren’t feeling entirely whole. It’s not easy, and no one is perfect. But we’ve decided it’s not impossible to brighten the world one smile, one kind word, one blog post at a time. To that end, a few of us writers have established The Kindness Project, starting with a series of inspirational posts. We post the second Wednesday of every month. 

Hi Everyone!!

I hope you are all having a great week! I was having trouble figuring out what to blog about, but I got to thinking… about winning. Not like Olympic-type winning, kind of like winning an argument.

See… I like to win… arguments, that is. When I first met my husband we were both the annoying “I WIN,” type of people. We would endlessly search IMDB just to prove the other wrong. We would try anything to be right. AND you know what? We would get into fights about it. At the time, it was more important for me to be right, even with something as trivial as whether Will Smith was in that one movie with that one guy.

The older I’ve gotten the more I realize that it isn’t as important as it used to be… OKAY, that’s a lie. It’s still important, but I realize more often than not, that’s it’s okay to let him believe something or just let it go. It’s pretty much the HARDEST DAMN THING TO DO, but you know what? I usually feel better when I do.

It’s kind of a cliche. I mean, winning isn’t everything? Come on, Erica. You can’t really believe that.

I do. Sometimes, it’s the losses that make us more well-rounded. It’s the losses that taught me humility. It’s the losses that shaped me and my writing. I mean, if we won all the time, we would have nothing to aspire to, right?

What do you think? Are you a gracious loser?

Want to join us? Grab our button, sign up and spread a little kindness.

Love ya! Er

Speak up:

27 comments

The Kindness Project – What Did I Say to Me?



Too often kindness is relegated to a random act performed only when we’re feeling good. But an even greater kindness (to ourselves and others) occurs when we reach out even when we aren’t feeling entirely whole. It’s not easy, and no one is perfect. But we’ve decided it’s not impossible to brighten the world one smile, one kind word, one blog post at a time. To that end, a few of us writers have established The Kindness Project, starting with a series of inspirational posts. We post the second Wednesday of every month. 

Hi Everyone!!

I hope you’re all doing great this week and keeping cool! Yipes, it’s hotter than the Magic Mike boys out there. (Yes, I will continue to use that joke) ;o)

This week’s post is inspired by this photo I found on facebook. It’s kind of crazy how something as simple as a picture with some words on it can make you think about yourself, but this one did.

Negative self-talk 

…is more damaging than if someone socked you in the face. I really do believe that. It can whittle you down to your core, it can make you believe things that are simply NOT TRUE. All because you told yourself that. Allowed yourself to believe in the crap your subconscious is doling out.

I had to put our beloved cat #GeorgetheCreeper down last Thursday and it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. He was sick and I knew that, but I blamed myself for not noticing sooner, for not realizing he was sick. After it was done, I thought about all the times I pushed him off the chair when he got in my way while I was on the computer, all the times I ignored him at my feet because I was in a hurry. I beat myself up mentally, over and over. I was in tears, clinging to whatever I could to blame myself for his sickness and ultimately, his death.

But I thought, after a bunch of people confirmed to me that I was a good “mama.” What was all this negative self-talk doing to me? It was making it worse, making me feel horrible. I wanted to feel horrible. I know that sounds nuts, but it almost made it easier to deal with if I blamed myself. Then I had a reason to not eat, to bawl when I looked in the corner where he slept, to feel helpless and alone. There was something comforting about that feeling. But all I was doing was damaging his memory. If I had stopped to think, I could have been trying to remember the good times. The times he came up on my chest when I slept, or curled up next to my head when I was reading.

It’s amazing how we let that negative stuff enter our brains and take residence, kind of like those little green phlegmy mucus monsters from the commercials. That kind of negativity in your brain can do real damage. I truly believe that is what helps aid depression. Just aids it, we all know there are chemicals and sciency stuff that are the real culprit, but if we were all a little nicer to ourselves, wouldn’t that make a HUGE difference?

It’s easier said than done. I know that. I’m still beating myself up for Georgey Peorge, and for some friendships that failed, work stuff, confrontations I’d like to take back. Pretty much anything and everything, but I’m trying. I will continue to try so that I can love myself the way I deserve.

If we all try just a little each day to be nicer to ourselves, I think the world will be a better place. Too grand? How about you’ll feel better each day you try it ;o)

I know this blog post was all love yourself, and I really did try to keep it positive because I know my penchant for using sarcasm and making fun of myself, but I thought this was important to make clear.

What are your thoughts?

Make sure to stop by all the wonderful writers sharing their thoughts today! The links are below the awesome video of one of my favorite songs ;o)

Want to join us? Grab our button and spread a little kindness.

THE KINDNESS PROJECT

Speak up:

10 comments

The Kindness Project


Too often kindness is relegated to a random act performed only when we’re feeling good. But an even greater kindness (to ourselves and others) occurs when we reach out even when we aren’t feeling entirely whole. It’s not easy, and no one is perfect. But we’ve decided it’s not impossible to brighten the world one smile, one kind word, one blog post at a time. To that end, a few of us writers have established The Kindness Project, starting with a series of inspirational posts. We post the second Wednesday of every month. 



The lovely Carolina Valdez Miller asked me to join this project and I was thrilled to. I think this is an amazing group of writers involved and an important message–KindnessWhat could be a better topic? And also, when Carol asks me to do something? I pretty much do it, ’cause she’s the best! And we’re total goofballs. If ever there was an inspiration to be kind. It would be her <3

I used to work for a call center.

I answered somewhere around 150-200 calls a day. I didn’t keep the job for long, but it taught me something really valuable. The value of treating each person as if it was the first call you’ve ever had.

Each person that called up had no idea that the last person I talked to screamed at me and called me names. They didn’t know I only had three hours of sleep the night before. They didn’t know I hated my job and wished every day I could get another. Some days it took all my strength not to treat them like it was the first time I’d been asked the same question FIFTY times.

Everyone has bad days. I get asked the same questions at work all the time, but I tell myself, this is someone new and they deserve my respect. 

The real lesson I learned is not to let my own crap affect how I treat someone else. I’m not saying to be fake, no one likes that, but I think taking the time to remember that everyone is an individual and even if you’ve had the same conversation with someone else before, it doesn’t mean that the person you’re talking to now will react the same. 

This is something I struggle to remember, but I think is so important. It’s like a bunch of dominoes. You never know how the impression you make will affect the other person or anyone after that.

What do you think? Is this something you struggle with too?

Thanks for stopping by! If you get a moment, stop by the other names on the list! Let’s spread the word <3 Er

Here’s my obsession song of the moment ;o) 

Want to join us? Grab our button and spread a little kindness.



The Kindness Project

Sophia Chang                         Sara Larson
Erica Chapman
                      Matthew MacNish
Jessica Corra
                         Sara McClung
Elizabeth Davis
                      Gretchen McNeil
Christa Desir
                          Leigh Moore
Sarah Fine
                             Tracey Neithercott
Claire Hennessy
                    Katharine Owen
Elana Johnson
                       Elizabeth Poole
Liza Kane
                               Lola Sharp
Amie Kaufman
                       Michele Shaw
Alina Klein
                              Meagan Spooner
                                               Carolina Valdez Miller

Speak up:

19 comments